The Stigma

While searching for any mate in another country you will encounter people who believe you to be one hell of a loser. Don’t shy away from this, it’s going to happen and you will have to make a stand. One of the greatest answers I ever heard as to why a man traveled to Ukraine to find his wife is as follows:

“I joined a local dating site and after several bad dates I decided to expand my boundaries.”

I heard this about three years ago and I still believe it to be the most unique answer that basically stops any further negative questions from those that may wish to demean you.

The terminology Mail Order Bride may never go away. When acquaintances see you with your brand new foreign wife they will immediately equate that you “paid” money to have a woman sent you. Don’t be mad at them, they haven’t a clue. Ladies from the Former Soviet Union, for instance, are some of the highest educated women in the world per capita. Ninety percent of these women have a university degree – no, that is not an exaggeration, it is actually ninety percent. The same applies to Philippine women and Japanese women. So given this figure, calling any of these women Mail Order Brides (MOB) is ignorant and nothing less. Most of the men who search the agencies are well aware that the women they are writing to are not wallflowers.

There is an argument when speaking of Latin speaking women especially with U.S. men. There is an abundance of Spanish (and Portuguese) speaking women in many metropolitan cities and there could be a case in asking, “Why don’t you find a lady in your hometown with the same characteristics?” Again, my answer would be that I am expanding my boundaries.


The stigma attached won’t disappear until this type of dating becomes mainstream so until it does you will have to stand tall and brag about your new wife. In most instances once others meet your wife they may ask you what site you joined in order to meet her.